aitiner x tally

A founder to founder chat

on LinkedIn DM-ing

Lexy: Sarah, I’ve got to start with the big question, what made you slide into my LinkedIn DMs?

Sarah: I was scrolling through my feed and saw your post about Tally and how you found so many pain points when planning a Hen Do. As the unofficial designated planner of my group, I completely resonated and it’s also one of the reasons why I started AITINER - an app that helps people discover and make their plans in London with personalised suggestions. With that in mind, I thought there could be some synergy between what we were both trying to do.

I also awkwardly realised that we went to the same uni but never actually spoke so had a moment of hesitation before sending you a message but life is too short so here we are!

What was your first thought when you read my message?

Lexy: Honestly? “Finally, someone else who gets exactly where I’m at.” I’ve had plenty of polite LinkedIn hellos, but yours was one of the first that felt like a real outreach on a founder level. Plus, I loved the whole “we went to the same uni but never spoke” twist. Clearly fate was just waiting until we both had apps to plug before throwing us together.

the Apps

Lexy: For those who don’t know, tell us what your app is all about and the gap you saw in the market.

Sarah: I was in a mental space where I wanted to build my own product that would actually be helpful to society. I didn’t just want to come out with a product or service that I’m not passionate about so I really had to reflect on the things that I’m good at. After a fair few podcasts on how to generate ideas and some reflection, something I knew for sure was that people always come to me for suggestions on things to do ‘Where should I go on a date?’ ‘Where can I have my birthday dinner’ and I always have a lift of options.

After 10+ years in the city and my fair share of trying new things, I’ve built a decent directory of places and always keen to try more.

This is when I thought an app that can automate and match what the user is looking for with spots and potential itineraries where they can scan and book these spots directly on the app would be super useful! And that’s how AITINER was born.

And what about Tally? How would you describe it, and what makes it different from other trip planners out there?

Lexy: Tally is essentially the level-headed friend in the group chat. You know that person who quietly takes charge of the spreadsheet, PayPal links, and WhatsApp reminders? That's me, and I've built the app I always wished I had. With Tally, you can add guests, poll them, track payments, split costs into instalments, and even share photos afterwards. It's less about making planning look pretty and more about actually taming the chaos. I just hate chaos!

on The nightmare of Planning

Lexy: You’ve mentioned that generic itinerary advice, especially for hen dos, can be a real frustration. Why is that such a problem?

Sarah: TikTok/Instagram and some online articles have loads of generic advice and even worse- a lot of paid for placements. You can find some hidden gems in there but it takes a while to scroll through all the noise. If there was a page to filter to budget and what you’re looking for, it would save so much time. And that’s exactly how we can solve that problem.

How does Tally help make planning more tailored and less cookie-cutter?

Lexy: Because Tally doesn’t tell you what to do, it just makes sure whatever you decide actually happens without ten meltdowns in the WhatsApp thread. Every hen do or girls’ trip has its own vibe: some groups want boujee beach clubs, others want inflatable flamingos and 3am karaoke. Tally flexes to whatever chaos you’ve got planned, and keeps the money, itinerary, and to-dos in one place so the organiser can actually enjoy themselves too.

On Collabing

Lexy: You’ve got the creative ideas and inspiration side nailed. How do you see your app working alongside Tally?

Sarah: I mean to me it’s clear - Tally is more of a tool for centralising the planning process and AITINER recommends the spots to go to. Everyone is so individual and the same goes for what brides would want out of a hen do, I think both of our apps value the users will make use of our platforms differently and that’s something we’re proud to cater to.

And from your perspective, what’s the biggest win for users if we collaborate?

Lexy: It’s simple: AITINER sparks the ideas, Tally makes them happen. You find the best spots in London (without scrolling through 500 TikToks), and then Tally keeps the payments, timings, and dress codes all in check. Basically, you inspire the plans and I herd the cats. Put the two together and you’ve got a full 360 trip-planning dream team.

on the uni connection

Lexy: We found out we went to the same university years later! How weird was that for you?

Sarah: It’s not that weird to me actually. I think paths cross for a reason and I think this is a fantastic reason!

What about you?

Lexy: I think it’s hilarious. We were probably in the library at the same time, stressed out over essays, and had no clue we’d both end up building apps that help people plan their social lives. Honestly, I’m just glad our paths didn’t cross in the uni group project era, at least now we get to collaborate on something fun!

OK let’s end on this one: If you had to describe building your app in three emojis, what would they be?

Mine is -

• 🙃 for my “what on earth am I doing?” moments.

• 🔥 for when I finally solved a pain point and it finally works.

• 🍾 because at the end of the day, it’s all about hen dos and trips worth celebrating.

Sarah: I love those - especially the 🍾 because celebrating the wins are so important and that’s something I’m actively trying to get better at. I’d say mine are

• 🫠 feel like melting at times as there’s so much to do and so little time!

• 👀 AITINER helps people discover places so I always have to be on the lookout for what’s new and happening

• 🤝 because I am nothing without the people helping me get to where I (and AITINER) want to be

5 Reasons

You Need a Hen Do Planning Tool (Like, Yesterday)

So you’ve been crowned the Maid of Honour. Congrats! You’re now head of spreadsheets, chief WhatsApp chaser, and the human glue trying to hold 14 women with wildly different budgets and opinions together. Sound familiar?

Planning a hen do isn’t for the faint-hearted — but that’s where a hen do planning tool swoops in to save your sanity. Here’s why you absolutely need one. Spoiler: we made a good one. It’s called Tally.

1. Group Chats Were Not Made for Planning

Yes, WhatsApp is great for memes and chaos, but not for managing deposits, dress codes, and who still owes £32.87.

With Tally, you can:

• Create polls to actually make decisions

• Share the itinerary in a click

• Track payments without needing a maths degree

2. No One Wants to Be the Debt Collector

You know that awkward moment when you have to chase your best friend’s cousin’s uni mate for £60 and they ghost you? Yeah. Tally helps you keep track of who owes what and when — without turning you into a full-time accountant.

3. Because 24 Messages About Dinner Is 23 Too Many

“Where should we eat?” quickly turns into a 78-message saga featuring three passive-aggressive GIFs. Tally lets you:

• Create polls

• Set tentative plans

• Lock in costs once they’re confirmed

It’s democracy — but with less screaming.

4. Every Bride Deserves an Iconic Itinerary

Even if she’s chaotic. Especially if she’s chaotic. You can:

• Add to-do lists and activities

• Share a gorgeous itinerary via WhatsApp

• Add photo uploads after the fact (hello, memories)

5. You Deserve Better Than a Spreadsheet

Planning should feel like part of the party. Tally looks good, works like a charm, and speaks fluent “organised Type A with a sense of humour.”

Also, who wants to explain formulas to the bride’s nan?

Let’s Get This Hen Do Sorted

Ready to go from chaotic to calm? Start planning with Tally — the hen do planner app that does everything except pour the prosecco.

Does the hen pay?

The Ultimate Guide to Splitting Costs

Meta Description: Confused about hen do costs and who pays what? Our complete guide covers hen party etiquette, how to split expenses fairly, and avoid money drama. Perfect for bridesmaids and brides-to-be.

Planning a hen do and suddenly realising you're drowning in a sea of costs, payment requests, and awkward money conversations? You're not alone. The question "who pays for the hen on her hen do?" is probably the most googled hen party query after "what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas" (spoiler: it doesn't, and neither do the photos).

Let's sort this out once and for all, shall we?

The Golden Rule: Does the Bride Pay for Her Own Hen Do?

Here's the short answer: traditionally, no. According to Debrett's guide to hen party etiquette, the established protocol says the bridesmaids and attendees cover the bride's costs. Think of it as a gift – you're treating her to one last wild weekend before she becomes someone's wife.

But (and there's always a but), times have changed. Modern hen dos often involve expensive weekends away, spa treatments, and activities that can cost hundreds per person. The old rules don't always fit today's reality.

How Hen Do Costs Are Typically Split

The Traditional Split

In the classic approach, bridesmaids and attendees pay for:

• The bride's accommodation

• Her meals and drinks

• Activities and experiences

• Transport costs

• Any special treats or surprises

The Modern Reality Check

Many hen parties today use a more flexible approach:

• Shared accommodation costs: Everyone pays their own way, including the bride

• Activities: The group covers the bride's share

• Meals and drinks: Varies by venue and occasion

• Special extras: Surprises and treats are still typically covered by the group

When the Bride Should Contribute

Sometimes it makes perfect sense for the bride to chip in, especially when:

Budget-Conscious Friends

If your hen party crew includes students, new mums, or anyone going through a tight financial patch, expecting them to cover your costs on top of their own can be seriously unfair. A good bride recognises this and offers to pay her share.

Expensive Destinations

Planning a hen weekend in Ibiza or a spa retreat in the Cotswolds? Recent surveys show that the average hen party cost in the UK is now over £200 per person. When costs spiral beyond this average, it's reasonable for everyone (including the bride) to contribute equally.

Large Groups

With bigger hen parties (10+ people), splitting the bride's costs becomes more manageable per person. But it also means more complex money management – hello, spreadsheet nightmares.

How to Handle Hen Party Expenses Without the Drama

Have "The Money Chat" Early

Before anyone books anything, sit down (or jump on a group call) and discuss:

• Total budget per person

• Whether the bride will contribute

• Payment deadlines

• Who's handling the money

Set Clear Expectations

Nothing kills the hen do vibe faster than surprise costs. Be upfront about:

• Accommodation splits

• Activity prices

• Meal budgets

• Drinks allowances

• Any extras or surprises

Use Technology to Your Advantage

Gone are the days of chasing people via WhatsApp for money transfers. Modern hen party planning means using tools that actually work:

• Track who's paid what

• Set up payment plans for bigger expenses

• Keep everyone in the loop automatically

• Avoid awkward money conversations

Regional Differences and Cultural Expectations

UK Hen Do Traditions

British hen parties traditionally follow the "treat the bride" mentality, especially for:

• Final meal (usually Sunday lunch)

• First round of drinks

• Any bride-specific activities or treatments

This aligns with broader UK wedding traditions where different parties traditionally cover specific costs, though modern couples are increasingly flexible about these conventions.

International Variations

If you're planning with friends from different backgrounds, be aware that expectations vary. Some cultures expect everyone to pay equally, while others have different gift-giving traditions. The Wikipedia guide to bachelorette parties shows how these celebrations have evolved differently across various countries and cultures.

What About the Maid of Honour?

The maid of honour often takes on extra financial responsibility, covering:

• Planning costs and deposits

• Decorations and surprises

• Emergency fund for unexpected expenses

• Sometimes a larger portion of the bride's costs

But this shouldn't be assumed – it needs to be discussed and agreed upon.

Red Flags: When Hen Do Costs Go Too Far

Watch out for these warning signs that your hen party budget is getting out of hand:

• Individual costs exceeding £300+ per person

• Hidden or surprise expenses appearing last minute

• People dropping out due to cost concerns

• The bride demanding premium options without contributing

Making It Work for Everyone

The Democratic Approach

Let the group vote on:

• Budget limits per person

• Whether the bride contributes

• Activity preferences based on cost

• Accommodation standards

The Graduated System

Consider different contribution levels based on:

• Financial situations

• Relationship to the bride

• Role in the wedding party

The Transparent Method

Share all costs openly:

• Create a shared document with all expenses

• Update payment status regularly

• Discuss any changes as a group

Your Hen Do Money Management Checklist

Before You Start:

• [ ] Discuss budget limits with the group

• [ ] Decide if the bride contributes

• [ ] Choose someone to manage payments

• [ ] Set payment deadlines

During Planning:

• [ ] Get quotes for all activities

• [ ] Book accommodation with clear cost splits

• [ ] Track deposits and payments

• [ ] Communicate any cost changes immediately

Final Steps:

• [ ] Settle all outstanding payments

• [ ] Share final cost breakdown

• [ ] Plan thank you gestures

• [ ] Document lessons learned for next time

The Bottom Line

There's no one-size-fits-all answer to who pays for the hen on her hen do. The key is honest communication from the start. Whether you follow traditional etiquette or create your own rules, everyone should know what they're signing up for financially.

Remember, the goal is celebrating your bride-to-be, not creating money drama that lasts longer than the hangover. A successful hen party is one where everyone has fun without breaking the bank or harboring resentment about costs.

Take the Stress Out of Hen Do Planning

Tired of juggling spreadsheets, chasing payments, and explaining costs to three different WhatsApp groups? There's an easier way to handle hen party expenses without the headache.

Ready to plan your next hen do without the faff? Discover how The Tally App streamlines group planning, handles cost splits automatically, and keeps everyone in the loop – so you can focus on the fun stuff instead of the finances.

Start Planning Your Stress-Free Hen Do →

Still have questions about hen do costs? Drop us a line – we've seen it all when it comes to group planning drama, and we're here to help sort it out.

Mistakes That'll Ruin Your Weekend

5 Hen Party Planning Mistakes That'll Ruin Your Weekend (And How to Avoid Them)

Right, let's have a proper chat about hen party planning mistakes, shall we? Because nothing kills the pre-wedding buzz faster than a weekend that goes tits up because someone (probably you, if you're reading this) forgot to think through the basics.

I've seen it all: hen dos where half the group didn't show up, weekends that cost more than a small car, and celebrations that ended with the bride crying in a kebab shop at 2am. Not exactly the Instagram-worthy memories you were after, right?

The good news? Most hen party planning disasters are completely avoidable. You just need to know what not to do.

Mistake #1: Skipping the Budget Chat (The Friendship Killer)

This is the big one. The relationship-ending, group-splitting, drama-creating mistake that ruins more hen dos than dodgy accommodation and terrible weather combined.

Here's what happens: You get all excited about planning the "perfect" weekend. You book that gorgeous Airbnb, reserve the fancy restaurant, and organise activities that'll make everyone's Instagram pop. Then you send the payment request.

Cue the awkward silence in the group chat.

Why This Ruins Everything

When people can't afford your plans but are too embarrassed to speak up, they either:

• Drop out last minute (leaving you scrambling and everyone else paying more)

• Come along but resent every expense

• Spend the weekend stressed about money instead of celebrating

How to Avoid It

Have "the money conversation" before you book anything. According to research by For Better For Worse, the average hen party now costs over £200 per person, but that doesn't mean everyone can stretch to that.

The fix:

• Set a maximum budget per person upfront

• Ask about financial constraints privately if needed

• Plan activities that work within everyone's budget

• Be transparent about all costs from day one

Mistake #2: Death by Group Decision-Making

You know how this goes. You ask the group to vote on dates, destinations, activities, restaurants, and what colour pants to wear. Three weeks later, you're still waiting for Sarah to respond to the accommodation poll while simultaneously trying to coordinate responses across four different WhatsApp groups.

Meanwhile, the good venues are getting booked up and prices are going up.

Why This Creates Chaos

• Decision paralysis sets in when there are too many choices

• People stop engaging when they're overwhelmed with polls

• Important decisions get delayed while you wait for everyone

• You end up with compromise options that nobody really wants

How to Streamline Decisions

Take charge of the big decisions and only poll the group on things that matter. Wedding planning experts recommend keeping group decisions to 3-4 maximum choices.

The fix:

• You decide on budget, basic location, and accommodation type

• Poll the group on specific dates, activity preferences, and meal choices

• Set deadlines for responses ("replies needed by Friday or I'm choosing for you")

• Use tools that track responses automatically instead of manual polling

Mistake #3: Over-Planning Every Single Minute

Listen, I get it. You want everything to be perfect. You've created a colour-coded itinerary with every hour accounted for, backup plans for the backup plans, and contingencies for if it rains on a Tuesday.

But here's the thing: hen parties aren't military operations. They're supposed to be fun.

When Planning Goes Too Far

Over-scheduled weekends become stressful instead of relaxing because:

• There's no flexibility for spontaneous fun

• People feel rushed and can't enjoy activities properly

• One delayed activity throws off the entire weekend

• The focus becomes logistics instead of celebration

The Sweet Spot Approach

Plan the essentials and leave breathing room for spontaneity. Event planning experts suggest that the most successful parties have structured highlights with flexible timing.

The fix:

• Book 1-2 main activities per day maximum

• Build in "free time" for chatting, drinking, and spontaneous fun

• Have backup indoor activities but don't over-communicate them

• Focus on experiences, not strict schedules

Mistake #4: Ignoring the Bride's Actual Preferences

Plot twist: sometimes the bride doesn't actually want what you think she wants. Shocking, I know.

You've planned the most Instagrammable weekend ever – bottomless brunch, cocktail making, spa treatments, and matching T-shirts with hilarious slogans. There's just one problem: your bride hates being the centre of attention and prefers quiet dinners to loud activities.

Reading the Room (And the Bride)

The biggest hen party planning mistake is assuming you know what'll make someone happy without actually asking them. Even brides who say "I'm easy, plan whatever!" usually have preferences.

Getting It Right

According to traditional hen party etiquette, the celebration should reflect the bride's personality, not what looks good on social media.

The fix:

• Have a proper chat with the bride about her ideal weekend

• Ask about definite no-gos and must-haves

• Consider her energy levels, social preferences, and comfort zones

• Plan for her, not for your Instagram feed

Mistake #5: Leaving Money Management to Chance

Here's how most hen party finances work: someone (usually you) pays for everything upfront, keeps receipts in seventeen different places, tries to remember who paid what, and then spends weeks after the weekend chasing people for money via awkward WhatsApp messages.

Sound familiar? This system is broken.

Why Ad-Hoc Money Management Fails

• People forget what they've already paid

• Receipt-keeping becomes chaotic

• Payment chasing creates post-hen awkwardness

• Disputes arise over shared costs and individual expenses

• The organiser ends up out of pocket for ages

Modern Solutions for Ancient Problems

The days of spreadsheet financial management and manual payment chasing are over. Smart hen party organisers now use tools that handle money automatically.

The fix:

• Use apps that track who's paid what automatically

• Set up payment plans for larger expenses

• Keep everyone updated on finances in real-time

• Avoid being the person manually chasing payments

The Ultimate Hen Party Planning Checklist

8 Weeks Before:

• Have the budget conversation

• Confirm guest list and get contact details

• Poll for preferred dates (with deadline)

• Research locations and accommodation

  6 Weeks Before:

• Book accommodation and main activities

• Set up payment tracking system

• Send detailed info to attendees

• Arrange transport if needed

  4 Weeks Before:

• Finalise restaurant bookings

• Chase any outstanding payments

• Plan backup activities (but don't overcommunicate)

• Sort decorations and supplies

  1 Week Before:

• Confirm all bookings

• Share final itinerary (with flexibility built in)

• Check weather and adjust plans if needed

• Relax – you've got this sorted!

What Makes a Hen Party Actually Perfect

Here's the secret: the best hen parties aren't the ones with the most elaborate plans or biggest budgets. They're the ones where everyone feels included, the bride feels celebrated, and nobody spends the weekend stressed about money or logistics.

Perfect hen parties have:

• Clear communication from the start

• Financial transparency and fairness

• Activities that suit the bride's personality

• Flexibility for spontaneous fun

• Drama-free organisation

Stop Making It Harder Than It Needs to Be

Planning a hen party doesn't have to be a second job. The most common hen party planning mistakes happen when organisers try to control every detail instead of focusing on what actually matters: celebrating your bride-to-be with the people she loves most.

Remember, you're planning a celebration, not running a corporation. Keep it simple, keep it honest, and keep the focus on fun.

Ready to plan a stress-free hen party that everyone will actually enjoy?

Stop juggling spreadsheets, chasing payments, and trying to coordinate everything manually. Discover how The Tally App takes the faff out of group planning – from automatic cost splitting to seamless payment tracking and group polls that actually get responses.

Plan Your Perfect Hen Do Without the Stress →

Got hen party horror stories or planning questions? We've heard them all and can help you avoid the common pitfalls. Because life's too short for chaotic group planning.